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Is It Really “All About the Titties” on National No Bra Day (a.k.a. Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day)?

no bra day, #nobraday , #nobradayselfies , NOT breast cancer awareness, metastatic breast cancer awareness day, breast cancer, thirties, 30s, 30s, pinktober, Breast Cancer Awareness Month

For Real?? Is the pink ribbon pasted on this pic supposed to make this image less offensive?

Is It Really “All About the Titties” on National No Bra Day (a.k.a. Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day)?

Though it has been three years since I wrote “Put That Pink Can of Soup Down & Put Your Bra Back On,” and two since it was published on The Huffington Post, it continues to be featured on Facebook pages and in articles and blog posts, etc. around the world and I continue to receive a surprising number of emails regarding the post and its message(s).

There is good news and bad news here.

I’ll start with the positive.

I hope you know how much I have appreciated hearing from so many of you over the past few years.  I need to tell you that while reading through the comments and messages you’ve sent, there have been so many times when I have been deeply moved by the stories and/or kind words you’ve shared with me.

I’m honored that so many of you have taken the time to read and share the post/article. I’ve been stunned to learn how many of you agree with or at least understand/respect my feelings about pinkwashing, no bra days, Breast Cancer Awareness Month, etc.  Because I stand by my message, I’m grateful that my point of view is shared by many other men and women who have been personally affected by cancer and by a surprising number who’ve had no direct contact with the disease. And I’m thrilled each & every time I hear that the post has changed minds and has educated…because it was clear to me that education was needed three years ago.

That being said, I must admit that despite continued positive support for the post’s message, I was wondering if perhaps my words might be too harsh for this October.  I wondered if those of you who might be reading it for the first time would be shocked by it because maybe, just maybe, things had changed so much so that the post wouldn’t have any relevance on 2015’s National No Bra Day and Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day.

I figured that a lot could change in two or three years and I had hoped that the themes of the first article wouldn’t be pertinent anymore.

Did things change as I’d hoped? Did “the Internet” deserve a pardon for cleaning up its act? Could I congratulate the former “No Bra Day for Breast Cancer” offenders for turning things around?

Well, you need only look at the image at the top of this page for the answer.  It took me all of 5 seconds to discover that distasteful National No Bra Day “for Breast Cancer Awareness” or “to support breast cancer?” advertising is still running rampant on the Internet this year.

“What’s the big national no bra day, breast cancer awareness month, support breast cancer, set tatas free, october 13, #nobraday, pinktober, 2015, metastatic breast cancer awareness day, bilateral mastectomydeal?” you ask.  Well, for starters, National No Bra Day for Breast Cancer isn’t a real holiday. When/where/how did this event begin and who created the first No Bra Day? Good question. The origin is unclear, but as far as a handful of journalists and I can tell, this event was created by Anastasia M. Doughnuts (hmm, sounds like a real name to me!) through a Facebook event page in July 2011.  The first event had ~400,000 supporters, so it was repeated in July, 2012. Then someone had the bright idea to have a second No Bra Day annually on October 13th to piggyback on Breast Cancer Awareness Month and to bamboozle women into thinking that by removing their bras, they would be helping the breast cancer “cause”.  If you ask me, Anastasia was probably a horny guy who was looking to expand his soft porn collection with girl-next-door pictures of breasts.  Well, Mr. Doughnuts, kudos! Your plan worked! And it may have worked better than you expected based on what I’ve seen this October 13th. Frankly, it seems that some of these girls have no intention of making a difference with respect to breast cancer and may just be using “the cause” or the event to share sexy selfies of themselves.

Sadly, the movement seems to be growing.  This pseudo holiday has gone international with an estimated 43,000 participants on the “International No Bra Day” Facebook page alone.

And much to my chagrin, many of the photos I came across when I searched the web using keywords like No Bra Day Breast Cancer were far more risque than the image I borrowed in 2012/13.  I can safely say that some could even be classed as pornographic.  Dare I say it, but I think “No Bra Day” has sunk to new depths this year.

Rather than give the raciest photos any extra attention by posting them here, I’ll tell you that they are easily searchable if you are so inclined.  But I don’t think the people/groups who posted them deserve the acknowledgement of their efforts to make light of and to sexualize breast cancer.

national no bra day breast cancer awareness 2015 #nobraday #nobradayselfie, bilateral mastectomy, oct. 13, metastatic breast cancer awareness day pinktober

And despite the song & dance on some of the sites that host these images, trivializing and sexualizing breast cancer is exactly what they are doing.

Take the “No Bra Day, For Breast Cancer Awareness” Facebook page.  The page’s owner claims that No Bra Day for Breast Cancer Awareness is meant to be a silly event that “really isn’t about sexualizing or about the breasts.”  But this is his/her description of his/her No Bra for Breast Cancer Awareness page & event:

“Boobies are fantastic, we all think so! What better way to express the way we feel, than to support a full day of boobie freedom? Women are magnificent creatures, and so are their breasts. Let us spend the day unleashing boobies from their boobie zoos. Ladies, free your breasts for 24 hours, our perkiness should not be hidden! It is time that the world see what we’re blessed with!
Your breasts might be colossal, adorable, miniature, full, jiggly, fancy, sensitive, glistening, bouncy, smooth, tender, still blossoming, rosy, plump, fun, silky, jello-like, fierce, jolly, nice, naughty, cuddly, sexxy, perky, or drag the ground.”  Not wearing our bras for the day is about “trying to GIVE hope [to breast cancer survivors], ya know?”

Pardon my language, but all I can say is, What the f*ck?

I could go on with this one, but I think there is no need.  You get the picture.

To be fair, this is nothing compared to some of the no bra day for breast cancer pages/posts/publicity I’ve seen in the past 24 hours.

Some of the posts/words/images that surprised me most can be found on Twitter.  I say “surprising” because yesterday was really the first time I had spent more than 5 minutes on Twitter and what I saw is not what I would’ve expected from a very public and mainstream site where teenagers, grandmothers, TV hosts, breast cancer advocates, movie stars, doctors, journalists and just about every other social media user has an account, whether they are in the public eye or just your average Joe.  Naive as I may be, I expected better for this reason.  I know, I know…

The feed for #NoBraDay (a top trending topic all day yesterday) is an enlightening read.  [  <—-  sarcasm]

no bra day 2

I’ll post this pic from the #NoBraDay twitter feed since it isn’t real. But some of the “real” poses rival this one from the waist up…

I’m pleased to say there are women and men on Twitter who share my stance on the day.  But i’m disappointed to say there are far more who praised yesterday either because it meant they’d get to see naked or braless “boobies, titties, etc.,” or because it meant they could “set their own tatas, girls, boobies, etc.” free and show them to the world if they felt like it.

I won’t lie. Reading/seeing some of these tweets made me dream of locking a handful of these folks in a room with a bunch of topless breastless women (like me) so they could have a little glimpse into at least some of the most obvious possible physical realities of a breast cancer diagnosis in our boob-obsessed world.

I can’t tell you how many perverse comments I read from men and women, how many racy selfies I saw, or how many tweets combined both [like a tweet too provocative to post here — it features a girl’s selfie (including her breasts/nipples and face, etc.) and the words “rape my chest”].  I’m shocked by how many girls were willing to bare their naked breasts in sexy poses “for breast cancer?”

I’ve asked this before, but how the hell could this help anyone with breast cancer and how could it assist with finding a cure or even raising awareness of breast cancer.  If you ask me, these provocative photos and poses do raise awareness of something, but certainly not breast cancer.

I have more to say, more to share, but since National/International No Bra Day has come to a close — and since I’m exhausted — I’m going to wrap this post up.

Before I do, it’s important to tell you that this day, October 13th, is the one day each year dedicated to Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness.  This should be a post of its own (and I will try to address this important day in a future post), but I think it’s rather fitting that I just have time for a brief mention of it here. Why? Because Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day has once again been eclipsed by “No Bra Day.”

Thinking about how a fake holiday that sexualizes breasts and trivializes breast cancer in the name of advancing the breast cancer cause (whatever that is!) and raising awareness for a serious disease that kills ~40,000 women & men each year should turn your stomach.  But knowing that it almost completely diminishes/overshadows Metastatic Breast Cancer on the one day each year designated for MBC Awareness should make your skin crawl.  Give me a break!  One lousy day granted to educate patients and the public about Metastatic Breast Cancer, to recognize the over 100 women & men who die EACH DAY because of this disease, and to acknowledge those who are living with it 24/7.

A less revealing pic from Twitter's celebration of No Bra Day for Breast Cancer... #nobraday

A less revealing pic from Twitter’s celebration of No Bra Day for Breast Cancer… #nobraday

So, yes, it seems that National No Bra Day is still “All About the Titties” and not the women attached to them.  No pardons will be granted this year.

I’ll leave you with the photos I included in my “tweeted” response to the #nobraday & #nobradayselfie posts:

Thank you for reading… All my best to you…

Dogs Get Cancer, Too

canine cancer edward carter motley zoo cancer in my thirties breast cancer 30s 30's

This is a heartwarming story that I’ve been meaning to share with you for some time now…

I’ll admit that when jme first told me about this little pup, my heart sank a bit.  4-year-old Edward Carter had been diagnosed with cancer — advanced T-cell lymphoma, a cancer of the white blood cells.  

My thoughts first turned to my own special girl, my Mattie, who died from an aggressive canine cancer (hemangiosarcoma of the spleen) when she was 10.  [Read her cancer story here.]  My heart still aches when I think of the circumstances of her death.  

But when jme told me that Edward Carter had a bucket list and that he was going on adventures and making the most of his last days, I could picture her smiling as she spoke to me on the phone, thousands of miles away.  Edward Carter would make the most of his remaining time and have no regrets.

jme is founder and executive director of Motley Zoo Animal Rescue, an rescue organization committed to improving the lives of animals and finding loving homes for those in need.  Motley Zoo is foster and volunteer-based.  They have a dedicated volunteer board of directors and caring foster families who provide temporary homes for dogs and cats in need until permanent homes can be found.  jme and her exceptional team have found adoptive homes for over 1,100 animals since Motley Zoo’s creation less than five short years ago.  She is so committed to her mission that she and her husband have personally fostered over 700 dogs and cats to help Motley Zoo.  In fact, it would be odd for me not to hear a chorus of dogs in the background when we talk.

So it is not surprising that Motley Zoo wanted to help this little Powder Puff Chinese Crested / Maltese mix who was abandoned at a local shelter and found to have incurable Stage V lymphoma.  [If you have any knowledge of cancer in humans, you are probably looking at the V and thinking it is a typo, but it’s not.  While the highest stage for human cancers is Stage IV, canine lymphoma stages range from I to 5.] 

Despite being dropped off at the shelter in September and later diagnosed with cancer, he was quickly swooped up and moved into his new and permanent home with Brooke, a longtime foster and Motley Zoo volunteer.  Because he is a hospice dog, he requires special care.  Brooke and her dog Ottis happily accepted the challenge and decided to be his permanent foster family, giving him a warm, safe, and loving home to live out the rest of his days comfortably.

Just like those of us humans who have been diagnosed with cancer, Edward Carter has an oncologist and expensive medical bills.  He also has caregivers who need to make decisions about his treatment and his quality of life.  And since lymphoma is a systemic form of cancer, it has to be treated with chemotherapy. 
canine cancer edward carter motley zoo cancer in my thirties breast cancer 30s 30's
But unfortunately for Edward, there is no cure.  The goal is solely to lengthen his life and to give him the best quality of life possible.

Edward Carter doesn’t seem to understand how sick he is.  He is active and full of LIFE and LOVE.  So creating a bucket list for him seemed like a great idea.  Motley Zoo even created a fan page so that his followers can follow his journey and participate in helping him come up with and check off bucket list boxes.  He has even been the feature of a number of news stories.  He is quite the character!

If you would like to learn more about Motley Zoo Animal Rescue or about Edward Carter and his bucket list — or even ways you can help him with his list or his costly cancer treatments, please visit his facebook page, aptly named Edward Carter’s Stairway to Heaven, or visit Motley Zoo.

And please take a minute to help Edward win Modern Dog Magazine’s Star Dog Photo Contest.  It just takes a second and you don’t need to sign up for anything — just click a button to vote and help a little dog’s dreams come true.

 

 

 

WOW!!!… And It’s Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Update:  Since I first drafted this in the morning, an overwhelming 26,000+ people have visited my little blog with over 42,000 page views today!!  Though my blog-writing has never been motivated by numbers (as evidenced by my often sporadic posts!), I can’t help but be incredibly appreciative.  When I first set out to tell my cancer story, I thought it would be seen by a handful of readers, at best.  To say that I am humbled by the number of visitors and the number of amazing comments that have come through today would be an understatement.  

I think the realities of breast cancer are often trivialized and “pinkified” so I am sincerely grateful to everyone who has taken the time to visit/read/comment.  I am sorry to say that my story is just one of many.  I’m hoping to pull together a list of these amazing blogs/bloggers soon.

Thank you all for reading — and, of course, thank you to the special people who are always there to “like” or comment on my posts, even when they are few and far between.   I am grateful to you all.

PIC_0589

Imagine my surprise when I logged into my WordPress account last night and saw that over 2,800 visitors stopped into my little blog yesterday.  Now, for someone who’s daily page view number peak was something like 622, this was a bit of a shocker.  I figured it was a mistake.  

But this morning, I saw that it wasn’t.  Naturally, I decided to investigate.  It seems that it is Facebook that is bringing the lion’s share of these visitors to my blog.  And the post that’s bringing them here is one that’s pretty fitting given what time of year it is.

As you’ve probably surmised from the pink ribbons that have popped up in the aisles of your grocery store, it Pinktober a.k.a. Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

I think by now most of you know how I (and a growing number of us) feel about October and the pink displays and endcaps that have appeared in stores across the country.  But I think it’s worth mentioning again.  I won’t rehash my thoughts here, but I encourage you to visit the post that is circulating around Facebook and the Internet.  I wrote it around this time last year on one of two National No Bra Days (there’s a fake one and a real one!) — NATIONAL NO BRA DAY & Breast Cancer Awareness Month (OR Put That Pink Can of Soup Down & Put Your Bra Back On) and then reposted in July (for the ACTUAL no bra day).

Though I don’t think it is that great a post, I AM thrilled that it is being read and I hope it generates thought, discussion, whatever.  Even if it creates a paradigm shift for one person who woke up this morning planning to post a National No Bra Day comment on their Facebook page, or if it makes one person with or without breast cancer feel as though they aren’t alone with their thoughts about how big businesses are profiting from and glorifying this deadly cancer, then I will be thrilled.

Follea’s Breast Cancer Wig Giveaway

cancerinmythirties.wordpress.com

Me During Taxol — just before beginning radiation — January 2011. This is a wig! I had a shiny bald head underneath this lovely hair.

The post below was left as a comment on my blog.  I wanted to share it with all of my followers who have cancer — or who know someone who is receiving treatment.  Share your story (or your friend’s, sister’s, daughter’s, mother’s, wife’s, etc. story) and you could win a lovely new wig or sleep cap…

I won’t enter myself because I have hair now, but I hope you will consider entering…

Best wishes!  🙂

And thank you to Follea, Lisa Elia and Candice Cousins for sharing this info!

———————————————–

Deadline for Submissions 11/18: Follea’s Breast Cancer Wig Giveaway – 6 Winners Will be Selected

Dear Cancer in My Thirties,

We believe you and your followers may be interested in Follea’s Breast Cancer Wig Giveaway on Facebook. Participants who share their inspirational story will have the chance to win a Gripper-2 wig, a beautiful Tres Chic wig or a super-soft bamboo sleep cap. To view the Follea video “A Woman’s Spirit is Unbreakable: A Tribute for Breast Cancer Awareness Month”, visit
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bhD75zYz92M.

Here are the Follea Breast Cancer Wig Giveaway instructions, which can also be viewed at http://www.facebook.com/follea:

1. There are two different ways that a woman with breast cancer can be submitted for a chance to win these prizes:

• A woman with breast cancer can create and submit a short video about her journey with breast cancer, how it has affected her life, and how she is dealing with it.

• A friend or family member of a woman with breast cancer can submit a video about how their loved one who has cancer inspires them.

2. Submit video by Sunday, November 18, 2012 at 11:59 pm PST.

3. All winners, including grand prize, second place and third place winners, will be determined based on the number of votes a contestant receives, in comparison to their competitors. Voting closes Friday, December 14, 2012, at 11:59 pm PST. :

• The grand prize winner will receive her choice of either Follea’s Gripper-2 Sport or the Gripper-2 Cool, from Follea’s innovative and luxurious 2012 Gripper-2 Collection. The winner will select from one of five standard sizes and available standard color and length specifications.

• five second place winners will receive one of Follea’s beautiful, short-style, premium European-hair Tres Chic MM6 wigs.

• 50 third place winners will receive one of Follea’s super-soft bamboo sleep caps.

4. Follea will announce the winners on December 17, 2012 at 12:00 pm PST.
Also, every Friday through December 14, Follea will conduct a random drawing of all of the contestants’ names, giving all participants the chance to win one of Follea’s bamboo sleep caps every week.
About Follea: The company’s 2012 collection includes wigs and hairpieces that are specially designed for women with little to no hair such as the Gripper collection, which is light, breathable and stays securely in place with affixed medical grade silicone tabs. Follea has ICARe representatives and ICARe salons around the world, so women can get hands-on help choosing just the right wig or extensions to suit their needs.
Would you like to receive any additional information?
Best regards,
Lisa Elia
Lisa Elia PR
310-479-0216